A Shift to Love

Stop Trusting

 

Stop Trusting

 

A

  client once confessed to me that she didn’t trust her fiance. She told me that she was having a hard time doing that based on her childhood and what he’d done in the past.

And I told her that’s fine. Give up on trusting. Just forget about it. Trust is pointless.

After some silence, she told me that she was a little confused. She thought I was going to help her find a way to trust him. To tackle the voices in her head to see that she can lighten up a little.

I said, “Trust is overrated. When people say they want to trust, they mean that they want to fall asleep and stop paying attention. They want to go on autopilot and move along through life blindly. It’s a lot like ‘hope’ or ‘belief.’ I’m a big advocate for being super awake and hyper-alert. I want you to be present with your fiance. I want you to be with who he is being right now. Be with who YOU are being right now. Not drawing from the past, but rather, RIGHT NOW. If there’s cause for concern, inquire in the most innocent way possible. Draw him out with curiosity and base your information on the facts rather than fictitious fantasies and delusions.”

In lovingkindness,


If you enjoyed this article, you can find a version of it in my book, Living the Zen Life: Practicing Conscious, Compassionate Awareness (Volume One).

If you enjoyed this article, you can find a version of it in my book, Living the Zen Life: Practicing Conscious, Compassionate Awareness (Volume Two).

If you enjoyed this article, you can find a version of it in my book, Living the Zen Life: Practicing Conscious, Compassionate Awareness (Volume Three).

If you enjoyed this article, you can find a version of it in my book, A Shift to Love: Zen Stories and Lessons by Alex Mill.

If you enjoyed this article, you can find a version of it in my book, Meditation and Reinventing Yourself.

If you enjoyed this article, you can find a version of it in my book, The Zen Life: Spiritual Training for Modern Times.

 


  Alex Mill trained in a Zen Buddhist monastery for nearly 14 years. He now offers his extensive experience to transform people’s lives and businesses through timeless Zen principles.

He is the creator of three powerful 30-day programs, Heart-to-Heart: Compassionate Self-Mentoring, Help Yourself to Change, and Your Practice, as well as the online Zen meditation workshop, Taming Your Inner Noise (now offered as The FREE Zen Workshop).

Alex has also written seven books on Zen awareness practice. The latest are entitled A Shift to Love: Zen Stories and Lessons (Get it for FREE here) and the 3-book series Living the Zen Life: Practicing Conscious, Compassionate Awareness.

He is a full-time Zen Life Coach who offers guidance and life-changing support to his private clients worldwide. Book a call.