“Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.”
—Thich Nhat Hanh

  always marvel at the imaginary lines we draw between “this” and “that.” How we fail to see life as undivided. Those who understand make claims like “mind and body are one,” which means the mind affects the body and vice-versa.

So armed with this perspective, we can see the power we have to create a difference in our lives at the shift of our attention. Instead of waiting to be happy to act, we can act to create happiness. And in my experience, to act, we must first disidentify.

What is disidentification?

It can be like being invited to play a game. I don’t know about you, but I often go up into my head to consult with the voices to see if I really “feel” like playing first. Even if it’s a fun game and I’ve never had a bad experience with it, I can still opt out of playing, simply because a voice concluded, “Nah, you don’t ‘feel’ like it.”

But what’s happened when I said, “yes?” Well, then I played the game and had a great time. I forgot all about my initial bout of resistance to the whole thing. And it doesn’t matter how many times I’ve had an experience of having a great time, I will still consult this illusory authority in my head that is going to determine the course of my future. Amazing!

So it’s no wonder that there would be such resistance to smiling — especially if there’s a danger to the voices that we disidentify from them and become joyful. That’s why it takes conscious effort to practice disidentifying. To smile. To disentangle from the mental noodling. To breakthrough to joy.

If you’re reading this now, see if you can smile. Will you smile? Are you permitted to smile? Will you allow joy in? If not, that’s fine too. Because now you see what you’re up against. You see what is in control of your life and how things will go if you continue to give it your power.